I have been feeling lately more and more the need to slow down, and do less.
With homeschooling about to start again, and the Christmas season for our Etsy shop looming, I know that I am going to have to be careful if I am not to be overwhelmed in the coming months.
I have gotten better organized this year, with schedules, calendars, and meal plans, and I get up earlier than the kids every day now, so I can shower, get dressed, and have breakfast before they even get up. I have cut out all extra-curricular activities save swimming lessons. But somehow, I still feel rushed, and I don't seem to have any free time.
Granted, I have four children, and one of them is only 5 months old! The baby takes up a lot of my time, and also sleep. I'm not beating myself up. I work hard, and I have lingering health issues as well that lower my energy levels.
It seems to me that right now, I need to try harder to simplify my life. I saw a quote once that said basically, simple living is deciding what is really important in one's life--and then discarding everything else. That makes sense to me, and yet it is tough, because I have already discarded so much from our lives. In many ways I am already very simple and old-fashioned. (Recently, my credit card was used fraudulently for a large purchase at the Apples iTunes store. When I called Visa, the woman asked me if I had an iPhone or iPod...I couldn't help laughing out loud. She obviously didn't know me at all.)
But I do, I admit, spend a fair amount of time on the computer. Okay, a lot of time. There are two things I mostly do: read simple living, homeschooling, and homemaking blogs, and research just about anything. I never, ever play a game (I haven't done so in many years) but I am addicted to something else--the acquisition of information. Seriously!
So lately, as I have been feeling flustered and busy and like there is just too much on my plate, and it is getting hard to concentrate--I have decided to cut way back on my computer time. Because it's not just an issue of time--it's an issue of information overload. With all the stuff I read online, combined with the number of books I read, it's just too much to assimilate.
I will continue to write my blog, because I love to do it, and because it provides an outlet for my thoughts. It doesn't even really matter if anyone reads it or not, as long as I can write my posts and get them out there. But I am no longer going to read any but a very small handful of blogs, and after I have breakfast in the morning, I'm going to turn the computer off for the day. I really, really love all the wonderful women I have met in the blogging community...Many of them have been more inspirational to me than they know. But it's time for me to step back. I only have so much time and more importantly, so much mental energy, to go around.
You know, often when I am out doing errands I get this overwhelming feeling that everyone around me is in a huge rush. People sometimes honk at me because I am driving "too slow--" as if I should be speeding with my babies in the back seat! And I have to wonder: Why is everyone in such a rush? Modern life has so many time saving conveniences. A lot of folks don't even cook their own food these days, so why doesn't anyone, seemingly, have any time?
All I can figure is that although some modern technology saves us time, other technologies use up more time. Maybe the people who honk at me are rushing home to play World of Warcraft or update their Facebook status or research hotel prices online or watch their favourite tv show. I don't know, maybe I'm wrong...I just get a sense that as a whole, the entire human race would do well to take a deep breath and step away from those screens for maybe a few days, or even a few weeks.
I originally wrote this post in a cheap spiral notebook at my diningroom table on a sunny Saturday morning in August. The pleasant drone of cicadas filled my ears, along with the occasional chirp of birds. The remains of breakfast--oatmeal and jam--were scattered across the table, and I felt serenely happy. It felt really nice to write my thoughts down on paper, instead of the computer screen.
I am very grateful that the wonder of modern technology will allow me to share the pages of my notebook with friends all over the world. But I'm also grateful that once I type the words and hit "publish," I can turn the machine off and turn my attention to other things.
Which is exactly what I will do. Is anyone else out there trying, like me, to step away from the screen more often?
well said; and yes, we recently started having a no-internet, no movies rule on Sundays each week. It has been quite refreshing to have that time for generating creativity. So much to do in life -- and here we all sit with our eyes on a brightly lit screen. Now I'm going to get off the Internet and DO something!
Posted by: rebecca | August 31, 2011 at 12:40 PM
I hear you Laura...you echo my thoughts exactly. We live in a fast paced, stressed out world one in order to survive it I believe you need to have wisdom as to when to step back and say "enough..no more" ...I call them Hedges...(they protect me and keep me safe)...Which is so important for our mental, physical, emotional and spiritual state of being.
Posted by: Julia | August 31, 2011 at 05:21 PM
Laura nice to hear from you again. Marlyn here at a different blog, some of it old, some new.( I ran out of picture room on my old blog) You are very correct in your thoughts. I do not own a cell phone for the very reason it annoys the heck out of me that people think they are so important they need to be chained to one like a dog chain.Yes they would be terribly handy to have, but you know if I was ever in real desperate need of one...... everyone around me has one I could borrow! Many say this generation is the "me" generation. I believe it is a "self absorbed" one. Ever have a youngest stop talking to you and text message a friend in front of you? I usually walk away, means whomever is on the other end of the phone is more important then my conversation.Everything is quick and now. Fast food, instant messaging. A whole generation who never sat at a dinner table, ate a meal and had a conversation (with the cell turned off.)I too write my thoughts on paper, in a journal full of ideas and tears. You will enjoy this writing when the children grow up. I limit myself to an hour of computer a day, which includes farm paperwork.Now go drink an herbal tea and relax.
Posted by: marlyn dubay | August 31, 2011 at 07:05 PM
It's so nice you put this in words. I'm fighting with this at the moment, watching the screen and reading blogs (yours :-), and lots of others), searching for books, ebay, ideas for crafting etc. But spending so much time at a computer takes away the time from actually doing those things. It's just a time consuming, and very much an energy consuming thing. You are so right to step back a little bit. I need to try this as well, and made a day plan a few days ago, which allow me one hour in the morning to write my blog, do finances, check out blogs etc. I hope it will work.
Good luck to you!!
Posted by: Marijke | September 1, 2011 at 05:13 AM
I think all that information can make a person feel really tired after awhile. And I agree with Marijke, it takes away from time spent actually doing things! I limit my time on the computer to just a 'coffee break' about once a day, plus blogging sometimes (which I love too.)
Posted by: Leah | September 1, 2011 at 02:17 PM
Thank you for this post. I hear you loud and clear. Although we don't get any tv channels in my home (hooray!)I find myself resorting to surfing the net when I'm feeling overwhelmed by the other demands and people (5 kids and a hubby, for starters) in my life. But you're right; it doesn't refresh me. It numbs me and overwhelms me in a different way. Plus, it sets a bad example. I am in the process of reprioritizing things in my life right now. I will need to take a hard look at this aspect.
Posted by: Sara Shalom | September 1, 2011 at 03:39 PM
Hi Laura,
I do know just what you mean.....
We have very few modern technologies except dial-up internet access on a new netbook laptop.
No cell phones, i-anything, no facebook, etc...
Thinking about you.
Warm wishes, Tonya
Posted by: Plain and Joyful Living | September 1, 2011 at 04:14 PM
Like everything else it's about finding balance. I too can be quilty of spending way too much time on the computer doing exactly what you do, I try and set aside some specific time each day - and thats it!. I doesn't work all the time but most. Don't be hard on yourself, life with 4 kids is busy. xxBrenda
Posted by: Brenda | September 1, 2011 at 07:30 PM
Oh my.. I didn't even think of the example part yet. Little Sara (:p) is just one year old, but of course she notices everything.. I'm such a bad mama.. And the overwhealming is so true!
Thanks for pointing this out to me. Laptop will be out of sight when she is at home.
Posted by: Marijke - Petite Daphne | September 2, 2011 at 05:08 AM
I'm experiencing a lot of the same in these past months, Laura. I really see how much I crave that connection with the "world" out there, as I'm home with the little ones, and homeschooling. But I'm realizing how much more I need to just dive into my role, keeping the focus on the people who are in my life, these little gifts that they are to me. If I need a connection with a person, I try to call someone instead of popping on-line. Or get out to the playground or the beach with the kids and do something REAL. Turning off the net is a good idea...I do that too, a lot. Blessings to you on your efforts. I'm a mama of four too, and I know the struggles that can be there sometimes!
Posted by: Erin @ Embracing the Now | September 3, 2011 at 10:00 PM
Laura, I really enjoyed your post...I've been feeling a need to step away from the computer, too...sometimes I think I use it as a pacifier :) Thanks for the inspiration!
Posted by: Donna Huebsch | September 3, 2011 at 11:14 PM
Sara, I feel the same way--I go to the computer to escape, when I am overwhelmed with the busy life swirling around me. I too find the computer overwhelming in a different way--I think it's information overload. I think going for a walk or just sitting in the back yard for a bit would be a better way to cope!
Posted by: Laura Jeanne | September 4, 2011 at 10:04 AM
Marijke, if you're a bad mama, then we all are! Don't be too hard on yourself. :)
Posted by: Laura Jeanne | September 4, 2011 at 10:05 AM
Well said, Erin. I think you're right--when we all "escape" to the computer, we are not embracing our role as mothers, and not focusing on the ones that really matter to us. Yet that connection with other moms online is so valuable, too. It's hard to find a balance!
Posted by: Laura Jeanne | September 4, 2011 at 10:08 AM
I totally agree with your post, Laura, and with all the rest of you say. Technology is a double-edged sword, especially the use of facebook and texting to create faux relationships. I must admit to using these communication forms, but I try to limit them. I also keep in mind that they have the ability to undermine true, authentic human interaction. And, at 36, I am not even the generation I really worry about - that would be the kids and teens of today who don't even know how to talk to people since they use texting and typing so much! I wish I had the courage to simply unplug, but that brings worries for me, too. Anyway, thanks for the provocative post.
Posted by: domini @ www.renaissancehousewife.com | September 7, 2011 at 05:03 PM